Amazed

Have you ever been in complete awe of God's love for us, His children? Not just the knowledge of what He did when He sent His son Jesus to the cross for us but experienced a moment when it was so real that it broke your heart? If you have not I pray that you do.

I titled my blog "My Journey" because that is exactly what I have been on in my life and, no doubt, will be for some time to come. In fact, we all are. The question is, is it your journey or God's? For quite some time, it was mine and I always wondered why things were so hard all the time. Even when things were going great- there was always a "wall" and it hurt when I hit it. There have been some hard years in my past that completely drained me and the only reason I am here today is by the grace of God. I know I have a purpose and it is not for Daniel Henks' will to be done...that's for sure.

Many years ago I started my own business and like most business owners I had lofty ideas of where I wanted to end up. Over the years it felt like on paper everything was there for me to grow and be very successful but it just never worked. Year after year it seemed harder to climb that hill until one day (with the help of several bad decisions) I just wanted to give up. Thank God I had many people around me who prayed for me and even helped me through it. I still look back at that fog and wonder how I got through? I wish I could say that I immediately started making right decisions and everything was great from there out but that is not the case. I am human and hadn't quite gotten to the point of complete brokeness yet.

Flash forward a couple of years- One day while on a mission trip in Jamaica I was sitting in a room talking with a good friend. That friend said something that will never leave me and has changed my life from that day on. He really didn't even know it was so profound because I am convinced that God said it through him as a pivitol moment in my life that would change my mindset from that day forward.

I asked this friend- "Why is it that no matter how hard I try I cannot get my business to grow past a certain point no matter what I try? On paper and logically everything is there but it just won't get back to the point of my highest year. Why would I get to that point and then start sliding and not even understand why? My friend simply replied- "Maybe God allowed you to get to that point so you could see what it is like and never want to go back because He has other things for you?" Now I know that might not sound profound to some of you but to me it was the "lightbulb moment"! I don't think I even slept that night because I was trying to comprehend all the avenues of where that could go.

Since that day, my focus changed. I do not give the credit to my friend (allthough I will never stop saying thank you for his friendship and his willingness to be used by God). I give all credit to my Heavenly Father who was looking out for me and saying to me that He has a different plan for me.

Amazingly! I have been more successful while working less hours and focusing my life on more important things such as my wife and girls, friends, family, church, Jamaica missions, encouraging others, getting out of debt and more than anything, God! It is a continual battle each day but God is using me for greater things and I will take NO credit for it. I clearly believe that if God gave me a talent He meant for it to be used to further His Kingdom and not to become prideful and say "look what I can do".

When I started this post about being amazed it was simply to say that each day I am amazed at what God has done but this particular day it was a little different for me. The past few days (probably longer) I have been a little too focused on me and my feelings and such and have been very aggrivated at myself about it. I haven't been very nice to my wife and last night she called me out on it. It was dis-heartening because that is not what I am about anymore. I still woke up this morning focused on myself and what I wanted today- that didn't end well. Once the family left and I was alone working, I got angry with myself and how I allowed satan to push the one of a few buttons in my life that are still strongholds...selfishness and pride. I am convinced that satan only bothers me when I am being effective for Christ in some way. He knows that if he can pull that one leg out from underneath my chair- everything will fall. That is what struck me this morning and then the grace and love that our God has for us to send His Son to free us from the penalty for being selfish and prideful and everything else. No matter what satan's plans he will not win and I pray more than anything that I will not let him grab hold of that chair leg. I have way to many people and wonderful things in my life that allowing that to happen could ruin. Just look at any of the dozens of public figures this has happend to. They were on top of the world and then that one little thing caused it all to crumble.